It’s everywhere, isn’t it? Instagram pictures of couples being couples, romantic tv shows and movies showing us how love should be like (even though most of them somehow end in tragic life events), Websites, books, advertisements, and the list goes on and on for decades… It’s romanticism.
I mean, psychologically speaking, we don’t need love. our lives don’t depend on it, basic needs are more important to us humans such as eating, drinking water, having healthy relations with our friends and family, serotonin, coffee. Lol, jk. But seriously, are people actually falling in love less than before?
If it’s true, why is it happening? And why are people breaking up more often only after a couple of months of dating or (as in Ariana Grande’s case) engagement?
We all know that millennials are hard to love, we, generation Z have been brainwashed several times by fake romance and now, after finally realizing it, we began to build a defense mechanism that made us even harder to love, but WHY is the question…
SHITLOADS of research on several articles and websites, I got the scientifically proven answers, or at least I think I had.
1.First, We love ourselves way too much.
Which is directly connected to either narcissism or the fear of being played or rejected by the other part of the relationship so we simply choose to protect ourselves by not getting involved at all.
2. We don’t know what we want
There are too many fish in the sea, and we’re basically better than anyone else so why settle down for anybody?
That’s what most of us millennials say and it’s a very good reason why we’ll end up alone or settling down for the wrong person after rejecting literally every single person who ever treated us well.
3. We’ve been in love before, it’s unnecessary and it hurts.
Bad experiences give us heartache, heartbreak and unnecessary emotional breakdowns which makes us vulnerable and weak to that one person. That’s why we decide not to fall in love again, that shit is pointless (As The Weeknd quotes in one of his songs)
4. New love rules by Social Media
Jealousy over social media, likes on pictures, cheating via texts, dumping via SMS, Investigating (Stalking) someone as a way to getting to know them better, memes, emojis, and the list goes on, millennials lives are controlled by social media and it’s taking its turn to fluck up our love lives.
5. Communication? Yeah… Lol, No.
Remember when old couples used to say communication is the key? Yeah, people are not doing that anymore.
Now, when something wrong goes wrong, we keep it to ourselves, why? Cause no one knows better than us, no one can make us feel better about ourselves than our own selves. So we ghost or reply with short answers (such as; k) to make the other person understand that they should leave us alone.
6. Anxiety about the future
We never know what’s going to happen to us after a couple of months, we might be in another city, another country, another continent, our feelings might change, we don’t know if we’re going to commit, we don’t know literally ANYTHING which generates anxiety when talking about commitment with our significant other.
Plus “who wants to settle down with one person for the rest of their lives? That’s for old people right?”
7. We’re in a competition of who can care less.
Emotions are disgusting to millennials, who wants that? Catching feelings? I’d rather catch a cold. Also, Pride is a huge thing to us and our ego is our actual amigo, let that sink in.
8. Lack of trust.
And that is because, yup, you guessed it. Social media, cheating has never been easier, with only one click and BAM, you’ve cheated.
Although these problems do not exist for every millennial, a new study finds that half of the millennials pretend that their relationship is happier than it really is. By becoming aware of these issues we can prevent being phone zombies who are incapable of giving and receiving love.